Splosion Man

This is the titular character from the totally kickass Xbox Live Arcade game Splosion Man. You use the analog stick to move, and you press any button on the controller to explode. That's all you have to worry about with the controls. The coolest thing about the main character (besides the fact that he fucking explodes every 5 seconds) is the random-assed noises he makes. It's all gibberish, but when you hear it over and over enough times, the brain starts to rearrange the noise into real words.

My girlfriend overheard the noises once, and she asked me if Splosion Man was saying, "Lunch pussy." I started listening closely and I began to hear it. I wondered if anyone else thought Splosion Man says lunch pussy. I thought about going to the message boards on GameFAQs to ask around, but it's well-established that even hinting at the existence of human genitalia is automatic grounds for death.

So I did the logical thing: I did a Google search for "Splosion Man Lunch Pussy" to see if it drew any matches. I learned a valuable lesson: Do not run a Google search for Splosion Man Lunch Pussy. You will not like what you find. I've seen things I cannot unsee.