Well, it's not like I got a featured column or anything. Today they posted their feature on why Wrigley Field sucks. As you know, I responded to the challenge by sending them this e-mail. Despite all of my work, and all of the sexual humiliation I suffered at the hands of that enormous, curly haired man, the guy from Deadspin posted exactly one sentence of the two-page e-mail I sent:"I half expected to find the Ark of the Covenant before I found my seats, and the smell was like taking a Fantastic Voyage inside a penis."
If he had to post only one sentence of the e-mail, I guess I'm glad he picked this one because I think it's pretty funny, although it's taken out of context and the actual point I was making is obscured and twisted to fit the point that the writer is trying to make. I feel kind of like a Michael Moore interview subject in that sense.
In the e-mail I sent, I remark that the stadium looks and smells like a shitty abandoned warehouse, hence the reason I expected to find the Ark before I found my seats, an obvious reference to the ending of Raiders of the Lost Ark. In the Deadspin article, the quote is taken out of context and it looks like my main issue with Wrigley Field is that your seats are hard to find. Anyone who reads the article who has also been to Wrigley undoubtedly finds themselves thinking I'm a fucking retard who can't read signs. So to anyone who thinks this was the case, allow me to reassure you that despite what you may think, I actually have mastered the advanced concept of looking at the numbers on my ticket and matching them up with the numbers on the hanging signs.
As an added bonus, here are the Deadspin comments that directly respond to my line:
"How can you half expect something?"
"I'm having a hard time even beginning to process this sentence"
"This would explain why the Urological Society of America holds their annual convention at Wrigley every year"
No comments:
Post a Comment